Romantic Relationships

Forgive me, I like to take a scientific approach to life. It is easier to explain stuff that way and kind of clears the facts from fiction. So today, we are going to break down relationships and understand how to make them work better. As always, this is my opinion and should not be taken as truth. Feel free to let me know what you think in the comments. We all have been in relationships at least once or twice in our lives, right?  If you have not yet been in one , be patient it will come to you. Love is like a heat seeking missile rarely misses its target and no matter how hard you try to dodge it, it will eventually find you. So, the “missile” has hit you hard and you are now in a relationship. What is next? What is expected? Lets share some ideas below:

What is a romantic  relationship?

This is when two individuals decide to pair…sorry its not Bluetooth. Let me rephrase, a relationship is the “process where by” two individuals decide to spend more than usual time getting to know each other…”facilitated by” the presence of romantic feelings. It’s sort of an upgraded version of bestfriends. I haven’t really found the answer as to how these romantic feelings are generated in the body or what triggers them.  I guess its nature’s secret to make sure the human species continues.

What is the  purpose?

Let me make one thing clear, its purpose is not an additional source of income. The purpose of a relationship is to get to know the other person and how to relate with the other gender on a romantic level.  A relationship will also teach you about yourself and bring out certain qualities you didn’t know you had.  For example, a relationship will show you that it is possible to lose sleep over an unanswered call, highlighting how much you care…about answered calls. In my opinion, relationships are also a preview step to getting married no matter how low key they may seem. If you master the art of communication and other teachings from the school of relationships , there is a good chance that you will be able to navigate marriage life with reduced hustle… and a very very strong heart.

How to make them work

There is no universal formula to make a relationship successful. There is a 50% chance your relationship will crash and burn, leaving you where you started.  I have not found the answer on how to totally eradicate the crash and burn anomaly. What I do have however is an opinionated formula to enjoy it whilst it lasts (whether its five minutes or 20 years… its up to you and your partner):

1) Respect the other person

Your partner has to be respected. Respect comes in many forms. Not cheating is a sign that you respect yourself and your significant other. Once you cheat trust is usually broken and feelings gradually fade into oblivion. There are also things that your partner may not like, for example, being late for a date. Make sure that you avoid continuing with the bad habits your partner does not like….its a form of respect. That said,  respect should be mutual.

2) Spend time together

Spending time together will help you get to know each other better and help form a bond. If done right, you find yourself knowing what your partner needs  without them  saying anything. The time you spend together creates a “telepathic link” between your heads and syncs at a frequency only you two can understand…just kidding. Thing is, when you spend time together you share stories and ideas that will help you relate better… and understand why your partner is a complete nutcase.

3) Teamwork

It is important that you both put in the work in the relationship. Even if your partner says  they can manage, find a way to show appreciation and effort back. You could for example, offer to pay for a lunch date. This will prevent your partner feeling like it is  one sided effort and you are doing nothing to show you want the relationship to work.

4) Be genuinely interested

Most people that get into relationships are genuinely interested in the other person. On a scale of interest from 1 – 10, I would put it on a 100. If you are not interested to level 100 on the 1-10 scale, you could stay as friends till you can figure out if you are just friends friends or friends friends friends. Nobody likes being used and the moment they feel like you are not genuinely interested, the flight hormone will be activated and you will never hear from them again. It is important that you stay focused on the person you are in a relationship with, having a wandering eye will only make you lose your current partner. 

In closing, I would say that relationships are a blend of  a romantic, drama, action and comedy movie all wrapped into one. Expect at least an episode of each. It does not matter who you are with, there will be ups and downs, some that will leave you with a headache and others that make you feel like a million bucks. It is up to you and your partner to decide whether to land the plane safely on the marriage runway or jump out mid-air…hopefully with a parachute.